Over many years of introducing men and women I have found that the single biggest mistake people make (and quite frankly one of the rudest habits we see) is “GRILLING” the person they have been introduced to about such topics as

*Why did you split up with your ex?

*When was your last relationship?

*Why are you single?

*Why did you join the agency?

*Who else have you met?

*How much did you pay the agency?

Not only are these sorts of questions inappropriate, they are downright RUDE!

People who persist in asking these sorts of questions are unlikely to ever find a partner until they cease this behaviour.

Some people even think they know better or have special rights because they work as counselors or therapists.  Some people say “I’m just inquisitive”.

No you are just rude.

Just because you have been ‘introduced’ to a person doesn’t mean you should throw all the normal rules out the window and put the other party through some kind of interrogation. If you had been introduced through a mutual friend or colleague or met through mutual interests you wouldn’t ask those sorts of questions. 

Treat the people you meet through the agency with the same respect as you would treat people you met anywhere.

On the same topic, be sure you are not guilty of ‘unloading’ about your past to the people you meet.

Never run down your past partner or the previous people you have been introduced to. It does NOT make you look good. Quite the opposite in fact.

People want a partner to enhance their life, no one wants to meet someone who complains about everyone and everything, or apportions blame for every problem they have.

So put on a happy face and talk about something else!

I watched ‘Millionaire Matchmaker’ last night for the first time. This lady seems pretty switched on and she was dealing with a problem we see very often.  Many men (and some women) find that their dates/relationships fail over and over again, simply because they are looking for the wrong type of person.  So often men will keep going for the type of woman they fancy, rather than the type of woman who is going to be a good partner for them.

On last nights show the gentleman in question complained that everytime he went out with a woman they had nothing in common.  They were from different worlds, he said.  He wanted someone down to earth, who he could talk to.  Then, true to form, out of all the women he could have chosen to go on a date with, he picked an actress/model 25 years younger than himself.  Of course, they didn’t get along, they had nothing in common. 

There is an old saying “If you do what you have always done, you’ll get what you’ve always got”. In other words, if you keep having the same problems over and over again in your relationships, perhaps it is because you keep going for the wrong type of partner.  

If you want to find a partner for life, have a think about the qualities that are going to be important to you in 10, 20 or 40 years time.  We are all going to get old and grey one day, so someone whose company you enjoy and whom you can laugh with is the kind of person who is going to be a good lifetime partner.  If you are only going on physical attraction and appearance, when the attraction wears off and good looks fade, what will you be left with? Of course you need to be attracted to the person.  Attraction isn’t always at first sight.   We can all be attracted to different people for different reasons.  Try spending some time in the company of someone who isn’t your normal ‘type’. You may be pleasantly surprised.

Cheers

Joanne

Things are certainly different these days when it comes to meeting people.

I’ve just been reading how different people meet these days and via Introduction Agencies is still way up there – like it has always been.

. I really enjoy the fact that we match great people together who might not otherwise have met because they don’t move in the same social circles.

If you’re looking to meet someone, give us a call and let’s see if we can help!

Take care.

Joanne